.Tuesday, December 30, 2008 ' 9:33 PM
Two more days before the end of year 2008. 2008 has definitely been a tough year for SML Land. Even if the anti-matter bomb did not go off yesterday and there were no major theifts on weapon industries around the world by terrorists working with santa, the attack of the FCC has left deep impression in all SML citizen's minds..
We shall have a look at the whole year.
Famous incidents:
1) Getting back your O level cert.
2) Wanci getting jailed for lighting fire crackers.
3) Disbanding of 4E07
4) ATTACK OF THE FCC!!
5) Destruction of FCC!!
6) Bug catching cum water balloon throwing at hannah hse
7) Farewell Kenneth!
8) Chalet! which i apparently missed
Person of the Year:
The guy who went to canada. Kenneth Ng King Kong!!
The faces of the other people are censored for their privacy! Except for the tongue, which in theory is not part of the face.
PICTURE OF THE YEAR:
Censored version. Full version can be obtained upon request. Please leave ur email in the crapping corner! haha
Of course, many more things happened during 2008, but i just cant tink of them now.
Anyway we shall move onto the real world now. So far no news have come up with regard of santa, but the SPD did find and rescue santa's elves. It appears that santa have turned against his elves and poked them till they almost died and tied them up and hanged them up side down on a bamboo stick on the 19th floor of the JCT building. Having battered 2 nights of icy hot wind and warm rain, they were finally rescued by the Power Ranger LightSpeed Rescue team that also rescued the people stranded on the SML Flyer not so long ago.
Since santa is also the host for Chinese New Year (he is also CaiShen), one of the elf have volunteered to be CaiShen for next year. He is currently undergoing CaiShen crash course training, which involves eating 100 cheese cakes, 1000 piece of butter, 10kg of lard and rinking 10000litre of mixed with melted butter a day .
SML Times wish him luck in his CaiShen training.
In the mean time, we shall look at how the scientists are doing at fixing the big hole at the north pole. So far they have only managed to dig some soil from the south pole. But they have encountered a problem- what will they fill the hole in the south pole with? Some have suggested that they should dig a hole in the North Pole and use the material dug out to fill the new hole in the south pole. Researchers are currently looking into the idea.
Also, SuperMan and SpiderMan have both reported to the police that they have lost their underwear and alien suit respectively. We wish them luck in getting them back!
And so we wait for 2009 to come...
.Monday, December 29, 2008 ' 9:26 PM
BIG NEWS BIG NEWS!!!!!!
We mourn for the loss of our
SML Reporter
Experditionary Unit (
SREU) which have ventured to the North Pole in search of Santa.
This morning at 2500hrs, the whole of North Pole was obliterated by a Fashion-Land made anti-matter bomb!!!!! Only a gaping hole is left in the earth crush, into which the sea water is pouring at this very moment.
SML Police Department (
SPD) has been called upon to investigate immediately. It appears that Santa has turned evil and had decided to work with the evil great grandson of the great grand father of the 9
th sister of the 10
th nephew of the 3rd heir of FCC!
Santa has decided not to give presents to the good kids and decided instead to give weapons to the bad kids. So far, he has been stealing weapons from various weapon industries and stores around the globe, including the famous Starks weapon industry. Weapons stolen include crossbows, arrows, swords, flintlock pistol, slings, wooden Roman era shields, wooden clubs and classified weapons such as the Iron Man's Titanium armour,
SuperMan's underwear,
SpiderMan's black alien costume etc etc.
There has also been reports of several attacks on various important cities around the world, including the white house, black house, blue house and green house. Broken windows and nuclear grenades seemed to be the main
culprits. However, the most
significant attack should be the attack on the owner of the white house, during which a pair of
Adadas cum
Ninty cum
Redbook shoes was thrown at him. Fortunately he manage to dodge the shoes and jump into a pool of molten lava near him. It is strange that such an attack would take place as the current owner of the white house will be replaced shorted. (the old one will be recycled) But who cares?
So far
SML scientists are working on a method to fill up the hole in the North Pole. Their idea is to dig a
similar size hole in the South Pole and use the soil they dug out to fill the hole.
The
SPD is helping the White House Country to find evidence of where
santa may have went. The latter
had sent out a number of flights of the latest jet plane (latest
outside SML land), the F-22 Raptor to locate
santa. however, every single plane was splashed by a red colour man flying in red red and
yellow armour with red underwear and black alien overalls.
In the mean time, the
investigators from Black House Country are trying to
figure out why
santa hav stolen the Iron Man armour,
SuperMan's underwear and
SpiderMan's alien suit. This is because they cannot work without the Marvel-made colour pencil mode power up system, which is always kept in safe hands and not known to be stolen.
On the other hand, Marvel Text Book Company has reported that the only Marvel-made colour pencil mode power up system in the world kept in their company
building has been stolen. They have already made this known to the whole world. Police are still investigating.
Finally, we wish to wish everyone that they will wish their best friends to wish them back a belated Merry Xmas and a be-
earlyed Happy New Year!!!
.Sunday, December 28, 2008 ' 10:27 AM
breaking news:
"SANTA's workshop has MOVED!!"
This was all our reporter could find at the north pole when he arrived
after asking a few polar bears for possible reasons of the sudden move, he has arrived at a conclusion: santa's crazy=D
currently, the reporter is searching around the area for further clues as to where the workshop has moved to. SML slackers here are wishing him all the best and praying that he doesnt freeze to death before finding the workshop(what happenes after that, we really dont care)
We assure our faithful readers that we will publish any findings the moment we here of it.
til then..merry christmas! and a happy new year!
.Saturday, December 27, 2008 ' 11:34 AM
SML has received complains from locals that they are not getting the presents on time.Also there were sightings of a big fat red man with only one reindeer. Thus, we have sent one of our reporters to investigate....stay tuned!
.Tuesday, December 9, 2008 ' 9:30 PM
After a long long time, someone decided to post something..
okay okay, to e impt stuff.
We shall look at all the ways that people send secret messages around SML land in order to inform their friends and families of something or simply when playing bridge. Enjoy!!
1) *wrink wrink* : you wrink your eyes at e person u are trying to tok to. messages spread may incude many.. eg, just play alone, you are murdered in the game murderer, let me this time can?? etc etc
2) using the word "HOR" : to hint who was responsible for something, eg, "Duno who HOR, do something n still dun wan admit"
3) enchi enchi enchi.. ... : pioneered by miao, it has been a favour during bridge games. It could be used by bidder to call out partner, by bidder's partner to hint to bidder, bidder's opponent to confuse the bidder, bidder's opponent to call out his own partner etc etc... ... ( according to 'reliable' sources, this method started when miao entered the classroom one day enching to himself.. wonder what message he was trying to send, and to who)
4) Your time is UP *favoured method* : means what it literally means, used to tell teachers that their time is up, leave the classroom or risk being turned into small toy figurine-sized figurines (refer to power ranger time force for more info)
5) Battle of the trump : very useful method in bridge. eg when you duno who ur partner is, n u wan to screw up e game, you put down a card that is the onli one left of its suit so e rest hav to waste their trump cards.
6) Absorb trump : burn ppls trump la...
7) say "look clearly ar!" to e bidder b4 putting down a card : hint to bidder you his partner. a favourite method by hk, but this method failed badly when his partner was shengyang!! God Goat eats everyone when his partner is not known... as usual
there you have it, some of the favoured methods of hinting... maybe you can use them in e future!
